Four Guys and a Snake
by Father Koopa
Summary: Link, Marth, Mario and Little Mac watch TV together. What happens? Find out!


It was about 10:45 in the evening. Link, Mac, Mario and Marth were sitting on the couch watching TV. Well, only one of them was watching TV. Mario was sitting there, watching Link and Mac quietly grope one another, completely entranced. The only sound that could be heard from the two were the sounds of Link smacking Mac's tight, hard, round buttock, the sound sounding like a tennis ball hitting a concrete wall.

"Oh, this is-a getting-a pretty hot!" Mario said, hard as a rock as he continued to watch the two. Mario was practically panting, gasping each time Link smacked Mac's ass. "what-a do you think, Marth?"

Marth ignored what the erect plumber said and angerly grumbled to himself. "I was told that we were going to be watching Burn Notice. It's not every day that Burn Notice gets marathoned on TV. They barely ever show it on TV." Marth was annoyed at the actions going on next to him. The sound of Mac's ass getting spanked over and over and over again with the constant heavy breathing from Mario made it impossible to hear the TV, and since Link lost the remote and this is a TV with only the power button on it, it was impossible to turn it up.

Mario turned his head away from Marth. "Well-a if your-a not-a gonna get-a me off, I'll just-a keep watching." Mario began to drool as he watched the two continue to go at it silently, hoping that they would invite him to join in on the fun.

Link and Mac went at it like two gay dogs in heat. Link kept silently groping Mac, the same face he always wore plastered on his face, while Mac kept doing the same, though this time he was kissing the blue eyed hylian hero. Mac stared into Links deep, majestic, beautiful blue eyes, that you could get lost in for days before going back to kissing him, Link giving his bum bum and hard smack in return.

With each smack, Marth's eye brow would twitch in annoyance, along with each huff and gulp that Mario made. "Why don't-a you stop being a stick in the mud and get-a me off!" Mario said, looking at the clearly annoyed blue haired prince.

"I just wanted to watch Burn Notice. Why can't I just watch Burn Notice. Why is it that every time we're invited, I can't watch Burn Notice. It's always the same excuse every time that Link lose his TV remote and I think he's just lying. No one looses a TV remote that many times." Marth kept mumbling to himself, it now sounding like a mantra. Mario looked at Marth, a bit scared, but also aroused.

"Why don't-a you just-a loosen up a bit?" Mario said to Marth, giving him a come hither look, but Marth kept mumbling about how much he hates it here, why did Link have to lose the remote again, why can't new TV's have a channel and volume button, blah blah blah. Marth heard another smack to Mac's hard, tight ass and that was the last straw for him.

"What are you two doing that's more important then Burn-" He shouted, cutting himself off when he saw what it was they were doing. Marth instantly got erect and began to drool as he watched the sight. "Oh so that's what it is they're doing." He said in a kind of creepy, breathy voice.

"See what-a I mean now? Now why don't a you come here and-a get-a me off?" Mario said, wiggling his eye brows up and down in a very sexy way. Before Marth could reply, the door suddenly flew open, crashing against the wall behind the door.

"Kept you waiting, huh?" The deep, smoker-y, manly voice said.

"Snake." Marth said, his eyes doe-y and his heart afloat. Solid Snake made eye contact with Marth, his manly eyes locking with the princes.

"I brought the Dane Cook CD's and the Coor's Light, but I see that they weren't needed." Snake said in his David Hayter voice as he watched on at what was going on before him. He saw how erect Mario and Marth were and the blank, pleasure fulled voids on Mac and Links faces as they spanked and groped one another.

Marth got up and ran his finger down Snakes toned, chiseled chest and looked him in his manly, yet emotionally hurt eyes. "Is that a Grenade in your pants, or are you just happy to see me?" The blue haired boy said, groping **Solid** Snakes crotch.

"Actually it's both..." He replied, taking his cardboard box out and putting it on over the two of them for an intense session of love making. Mario watched as the box began to shake, a look of sadness and irritation on his face.

"Fine! If-a no one is going-a to get-a me off, I'll just-a have to do it my self!" Mario said, his erection so hard now that it broke through his pants and he began to furiously stroke his magic mushroom.

Minutes passed inside the box. Marth pulled off Snakes sneaking suit and as he did so, he heard a 'ping' sound. "Hmm? What was that?" He said, pulling up what looked like a metal pin. "OH SHIT!" He yelled as he got of off the box seconds before the grenade exploded. Chunks of the not Keffer Sutherland Snake flew all over the place, Marth getting splattered by some of Snakes blood. Marth looked at the mess, a shell shocked face was all he wore. Mario, still furiously wanking, turned his body to look at Marth and the sight before him.

"I guess-a he-a had-a good time." Mario said.

"A man just died here." Was all Marth could mutter as he kept staring at the sight.

"I guess-a we'll just-a have to invite-a Roy back then for the next-a Smash Bros!" Mario said, finally spooging all over Marth's bare back.

The End.

 **A/N: This is the stupidest thing I have ever come up with. Was reading a fanfic with a friend of mine that was similar, and the two of us came up with this... thing. I am ashamed of it, but I wanted to post it anyway. Hope you liked it.**


End file.
